So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
Randomize