Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
Floor bacon is actually really good
Randomize
