So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
You said you didn't want to drink anymore so you started shooting vodka down the back of your throat using a syringe. Oh, and then you aimed it at my eye ball...vodka in the eye hurts btw.
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
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