Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
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