How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
You can't motorboat a personality
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
Randomize
