scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
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