Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
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