you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
Randomize
