Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
I'm drinking with 3 chicks and 1 gay dude. 100% chance I'm getting laid and 75% chance I'll enjoy it.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
Randomize
