I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
thus making me awesome and them whores
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
Randomize
