so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
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