I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
Randomize