is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
It's not my fault. Someone keeps buying me tequila shots. Idk who. But every time I look down there's another. I think there's a conspiracy.
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
Ugh I just wanna make an announcement like: Attention high school classmates: if we haven't spoken in 5 years, we don't need to start now. Please be on your way
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
Can I just text her like "yo sorry I fucked your boyfriend, let's go get sushi" or like nah
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
Randomize
