i don't plan on having that self control this summer
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
We bought a hamster while completely stoned and 2 hours later returned it because your mother wouldnt let you bring it in her house. You cried. a lot.
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
My boss couldn’t find her phone so she asked me to call it and when I found it the screen said Fuck Toy was calling. I’m very much okay with this
Randomize
