i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
You should be grateful to be my roommate. My booty calls always drive you places in the morning.
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
I'm so drunk I forgot what to do to go pee.
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
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