maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
Hey, so I'm not coming into work til Friday. Some guy I've known for about 8 hours just offered me a free vacation to Maui and bought my plane ticket. He's Aussie so I'm 75% sure he won't murder me
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
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