Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
I will come over now to take full advantage of you in your vulnerable state.
Fine. I should warn you I just threw up in danas fish tank. Fish are dead. Livers dead. I smell and look like a dead animal. And not showering. So deal with it.
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
Dear in laws. I am not spending any holidays with you. I dislike your company. A lot.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize
