This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
Dad stumbling and puking in the White Castle parking lot = Father's Day success
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
just discovered a semi frightening wound on the side of my head that must have happened last night. if i die of a brain aneurysm, make sure they put "sorry for partying" on my gravestone.
There's even glitter on my cock...
Randomize
