i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
Screaming "dámelo" at the bottle of scotch was definitely my best and worst moment of Cinco de Mayo 2015.
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
Randomize
