Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
Every time I type "should" my phone autocorrects to "shouldn't". even my phone knows my ideas are terrible.
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
Apparently I thanked the paramedics over and over again for saving the "happy new year" beads that I was wearing
Why is the turtle in the toilet again?
Well as I was puking in the tub I put him in there to keep me company but I am almost positive the original setup was him in the tub and me next to the toilet...I hope he likes tequila
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
Randomize
