My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
Randomize
