Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
First drunken handjob: not successful. Second handjob, mostly sober: much better. Nightly news brought to you by me.
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
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