i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
I need you to know that everytime my toddler does the downward facing dog in the nude I think about the night you and your dude fell in love.
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
Randomize
