don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
Randomize
