yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
Randomize
