This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
I'm chatting with a girl missing a front tooth. I find it quite distracting. I'm sure you have deduced what bar I'm drinking in on this monday night.
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
In other news there is a guy at my office who I'm pretty sure will be wearing someone's skin as a coat one day.
I don't want to flatter myself but after the way he was looking at me today I think it might be me.
Just read the 12 signs you're a horrible roommate post and fucking in your roommate's bed wasn't on the list, so I'm a pretty awesome roommate.
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
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