Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
Randomize
