I don't think I can get bothered with getting laid tonight
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
my liver is dry heaving
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
Randomize
