She went from zero to smokin in five shots
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
Randomize
