the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
My eyes are so dilated i literally have night vision right now.
I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
Randomize
