Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
I make one hell of a fire on Ambien. Other life choices not so much. But fire. Fire I can do.
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
Randomize