He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
My niece just threw up all over me. My sister's breastmilk was on my face. This is like a fucked-up porno gone terribly wrong.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
I've been drunk texting you for weeks, and you watched me puke outside your house... I say it's time we meet in person.
Randomize
