Did I ever tell you that the first person i made out with cried?
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
Went to the doctor's today. The lady took one look at my throat and said "oh god"
Too much penis in there.
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
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