Someone shit on the floor
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
How does it feel to date your dad?
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
What the fuck dude? Now it's a "who is this?" convo going back and forth. Like... helllloooo you just sent me a picture of your penis! I'm entitled to ask who the fuck it is. I can't verify an identity by a body part.
Randomize
