Where is the hickey?
you told the bartender not to open the bottle because you were gonna put it in your purse in case you get cut off later
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
Did I mention I should never take 5 Xanax and drink?
I sort of figured that out when I found you sitting on the roof of your house saying we could get in through the skylight while I called the locksmith.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
Fuck. What bets did I make about "yeah when the Cubs win the World Series" that I gotta reneg on????
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
Randomize
