Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
On the back of that comment, I've formed a theory that as a result of my brainwashing your drunk self actually believes that beards are your calling.
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
I let my cat eat the pepperonis off of my pizza while I was still eating it. That's the level of tequila drunk I got last night.
God I adore you.
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
In other news, I just sneezed and almost shit myself. What is happening to my life??
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
Randomize
