I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
Come put a leash on your gf. She just challenged 8 cops to a wrestling match for 'tag team champion of the world'
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
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