NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
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