I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
I can't believe I forgot to wish you a happy 13 week-iversary of the time you raw-dogged a rando. Only two days late, so it still counts. And since your 14 weeks is coming up, you should know that at 14 weeks your baby can squint, frown, grimace, pee, and possibly suck his/her/their/zir thumb!
Last night was a sign that I need to stop sleeping with any girl that can quote the mighty ducks
Specially the ones that look like Goldberg
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
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