...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
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