So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
Randomize
