Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat.
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
Why is there a condom in my ukulele?
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
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