So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you.
You always know what to say to make me feel better.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
Randomize
