what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
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