he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
She offered to massage my back by hitting it with a sparkly purple double dildo... Bi chicks can get creepy
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
Randomize
