so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
You drunkenly promised dick pics on your way out the door and then never delivered. I don't know how I'll ever be able to trust you again.
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
Randomize
