And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
What's worse: not calling my parents in Dallas to make sure they're alright or not taking shelter to masturbate all over my douchebag roommates clothes?
I worry about you.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
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