I woke up this morning with my shirt on upside down.
You mean inside out.
No, upside down. I ripped the neck hole in the process of getting it around my waist.
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
I'm more picky about my flip flops than the guys I sleep with
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
HE FINALLY TEXT ME AND CALLED ME BY MY TWITTER NAME STAND BY FOR THE WEDDING INVITE, BRIDESMAID
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