he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
Definitely need to find a less healthy bootycalls. All this bitch got in her fridge is feta, English muffins and wheat grass. What the fuck can I make with that???
Found 2 Coors, problem solved.
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
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