i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
He booked us a hotel at a resort in cancun for sprng break... I just wanted to get laid this weekend when i was blackout i didnt know it was gonna spiral into a mess of events like a 5 month in advance commitment
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
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