My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
I just ate a dove chocolate and the wrapper said "chocolate: always your valentine" WHAT KIND OF JACKASS WRITES THESE AND WHY MUST THEY MOCK ME?
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
Don't talk to me about lonely until you're eating marshmallows for dinner in your underwear watching House of Cards for 12 hours straight. I hate all you couples
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
Randomize
