Oh shit, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises
I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
I sliced my fucking arm open last night after margarita madness and had to drive myself to the ER. Got six stitches and a social worker came in and asked if I was abused due to my sex bruises. I literally had to tell her "don't worry, I like it rough"
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
I need to calm my uterus...
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
Randomize
